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November 20, 2002
November 20, 2002
8 months old
There is just something about Cameron that I can’t describe. I don’t know, maybe it’s his face, his shapely little legs, the way he touches my face, the way he coos when I hold him. Maybe it’s all those things, but whatever it is, it is changing me. I am not the same person now that I was a year ago. No better, no worse, just different. I guess motherhood just does that to a woman.
What Cameron is Up To
Ok, I know I sound like a broken record, but it is simply amazing to me how much Cameron changes every week. It’s like he is almost a different child every time I look at him and though he is doing the same things that every other child his age does, we still remain impressed. I know I have used this expression before, but to us, every thing that Cameron does is about as incredible as if he were splitting the atom. Additionally, he is developing the sweetest little personality. He’s becoming more and more affectionate as the weeks pass. Not clingy, necessarily but more attached to us and naturally, more attached to me. He is getting to that stage where he will cry if I leave the room, even when Charles is right there with him. He never used to do this before, he’d only cry if I left him alone, like in his pack and play in the family room while I went to go do something in the kitchen. Now it’s almost as if he misses me. What can I say, it’s great.
Developmentally, there are a lot of changes going on as well. First of all, Cameron is teething harder than ever. Still not a tooth to show for all his suffering, but you can still see they are nearly there. His bottom gums have two raised bumps that look like tooth nubs but are just covered in flesh. Due to this teething, he is suffering in other ways too. He has a severe diaper rash, severe diarrhea and very rosy cheeks, all of which I have been told are the result of teething.
Cameron crawls at warp speed, I don’t think I have ever seen a kid crawl so fast because even when I run, it’s still hard to keep up with him. The thing that still pisses me off is that even though he has been crawling for awhile now, his belly button still refuses to go back in even though the pediatrician had said it would. The use of the stomach muscles are supposed to suck the belly button back in. Why does this not surprise me that it is still sticking out? I hate to be so superficial about something that is so unimportant but trust me, if you saw it, you’d understand why it bothers me. It is not just an “outie,” it is almost like a mushroom. I told my pediatrician that if it doesn’t go in I want it surgically taken care of and his response to me was that I care about the way it looks more than Cameron ever will. My response to HIM was that if Cameron is truly my son, I seriously doubt it.
I am still BFing and that will come to a screeching halt on his 9 month birthday. I will miss the bonding part of BFing of course, as well as our special cuddling, etc., but other than that, in a way, I look forward to ending this process. Don’t get me wrong, I loved BFing more than I ever thought I would but it’s time. I would have stopped sooner if Cameron had teeth already, but since he doesn’t and he never appeared to want to stop BFing, I figured there was no point in discontinuing the practice. However, I think 9 months is plenty of time plus it falls at a point where I think it will be easier to stop. We will be on vacation at that time and I am hoping that with the time change, schedule change and general change of routine that Cam will completely forget about it altogether. Of course, this could backfire on me and he may want to BF even more. It will sadden me to end this special part of our lives together but, that is what life is all about, moving on to the next stage.
The one good thing about ending this process is that the rash I had on my upper arms is finally almost gone. Ever since I had Cameron, I have had these tiny little pimples all over my arms. It drove me nearly nuts because my arms were so smooth and blemish free before, but since March, they appear as though someone has written on them in Braille. I was loofah-ing them to death to try and get them smooth again, but my OBGYN told me that the only thing that will make the blemishes go away is to stop BFing. The hormonal change in my body due to milk production is what causes the blemishes. Sure enough, as I only BF now about 2X/day, the pimples are rapidly disappearing and you can hardly notice them.
Hearing Update (Not Really)
On November 13, Charles and I took Cameron for his latest appointment with the audiologist where they were supposed to perform the tymponometry. A tymponometry is a test for fluid in the eardrum. The specialist in Manhattan seemed to think that Cameron had fluid in his ears which was obstructing the sound waves and obscuring the test results. So, we went to this appointment at Georgetown University and were seen by two very nice audiologists. To make a long story short, they performed the test and said that Cameron no longer had fluid behind his ears but that for some reason, they weren’t getting a good reading on his hearing. So, they then did an exam on him and informed us
that Cameron’s ear drums are retracted (tilted) due to a cold he was suffering from and that his ears were a bit clogged. So again, we were unable to really get a true answer as to what the story is. Nevertheless, they then took Cam into a soundproof room to test his hearing behaviorally. The audiologists both warned us that this is an extremely difficult age to test hearing because a baby can easily be hearing a sound and be so focused on something else, that he doesn’t react to the sound he’s hearing. Additionally, they told me something very important, that a baby can also (to a degree), outgrow a hearing loss as he ages and his eardrums get larger. It’s not common but it’s not rare either, for this to happen. I went in with Cam and held him on my lap while the audiologists sent a variety of different sounds through the soundbooth. On either side of the room, behind the chair where we were sitting, were mechanical teddy bears behind glass windows that played very loud drums. Each and every time they played the bears, Cameron would turn around to either side to look at where the sound was coming from, so we were rather encouraged by that. The audiologists said that despite Cameron’s reaction, they still want to do a repeat BAER test (Brain Auditory Evoked Response), to see exactly what Cameron’s results are. So, though we have no definitive answer, I am still not worried. I think that I was initially upset months ago because these incompetents that we previously saw made it sound like Cameron was Helen Keller or something. Now that I can see how well he reacts to sound and speech, I won’t even be upset if Cam does in fact have a hearing loss or needs to wear a hearing aid/implant, because based upon the way he responds and reacts to sound, I know that it is really not that big deal and that he will be fine in the end. And isn’t that all that really matters?
Nights Out
This past Saturday, Charles and took up a friend on an offer to baby-sit and went out to dinner and a movie. It was simply fabulous, and at the risk of sounding like I don’t love my child, it was GREAT to be away from him from awhile. Of course, I love Cameron more than anything but I truly believe that in order to maintain a healthy marriage and to remain a happy couple, you need to get away from your child every now and again. We didn’t do anything spectacular, just dinner and a movie but what a nice feeling to recapture what it felt like when it was just the two of us. Don’t get me wrong, I prefer our life now as the three of us, but it was such a nice feeling to be alone with Charles again.
Crate and Barrel held a benefit to support cancer awareness last week, and I went along with Cameron. It was not a formal affair but people were still supposed to dress nicely so I had Cameron in these charcoal/black velvet overalls from Baby Gap with a crisp white button down shirt and a pair of black patent leather shoes. I know, I know – sounds a little frou-frou but it wasn’t, it was just adorable. I strapped him in the Baby Bjorn facing forward so he could see everything and as soon as we walked out onto the floor, it was so weird, it was almost like a spotlight was on us because everyone kept coming up to us to play with Cameron and tell us how beautiful, how sweet he is, etc. The thing about Cameron, (and Charles gets so mad with me when I say this), is it is not that he is beautiful, in all honesty. He’s a CUTE kid, yes but more important than the physical, it’s just that he has this little personality that I think, really shines through, and people really seem to eat it up. It is the one thing that people consistently comment on about him, that they have never seen a baby as young as he is who is so alert, happy and reactive. This makes me feel good because I think every mother wants confirmation or validation that her child is happy and alert. Makes me feel like I am doing something right.
Cameron soaks up attention like a sponge soaks up water. Someone smiles at him or touches his hand and he squeals in delight. He laughs constantly and throws his arms up and shrieks in sheer glee whenever someone shows him just a little bit of attention. He doesn’t shy away from anyone, which I find a little odd, if not disturbing, now that I think about it. I don’t know what it all is, really. I guess it is just something about Cam.
Two Questions
This is going to sound really stupid but I am dying to know – if you have a baby in your car, are you allowed to ride in the HOV (commuter) lane? If not, at what age does a child qualify as another person (for HOV purposes)? I was driving on the Beltway last night in rush hour traffic and the HOV lane was completely empty. I was half tempted to go in it but figured with my luck I’d get a ticket, so it would be nice to know.
Second, has anyone seen that commercial for UPromise.com? It is a savings plan that allows you to create a savings account for your child’s college education by registering your credit cards and store bonus cards so that every time you use them, a portion of the money spent is put into an account. It sounds like a very foolproof plan but being the old-fashioned, non-trusting individual that I am, I am hesitant to register my credit/debit card over the internet. I was wondering if any of you have joined this program and if so, what do you think of it?
Christening
We are driving up to CT tomorrow and staying through Thanksgiving. This Sunday, the 24th, Cameron will be christened at an Episcopalian church where Charles’ Aunt belongs. I ended up just getting Cameron a traditional christening outfit at Nordstrom’s that, as far as christening outfits go, I actually like. It is a long sleeved, one piece pant outfit, the top part being a blousy sort of style with pants that look more like knickers. It is cute and not as heinous as it could have been, so I am satisfied. I did check out Wal-Mart (thanks Nancy!), and though there were a few “nice” outfits, (nice being a relative term), they didn’t have any outfits in Cameron’s size, they were all for newborns. One thing is for sure, if I ever have another child, I will be sure to have it christened the first month, I am not going through this again.
Stroller Dilemma
Well, I still have not figured out my stroller dilemma. First of all, I kept vacillating between the umbrella stroller/heavy stroller issues. Then when I finally reached my decision, (to take the heavy stroller), I called the airline just to make sure there would be no problem. I was told by these utter morons that they are not sure WHAT I can bring, it will all depend on the stroller once they see it as well as how full the flight is. So, now I am back to Square One. I considered bringing the stroller to the airport to have them assess it but then decided that that was not good enough because with my luck, they’d change their minds on the day of our flight and refuse my stroller. So now I think I am going to simply bite the bullet and buy the umbrella stroller. Man, what a racket. Of course, it is all my own fault for falling into the ridiculous belief that an umbrella stroller from CVS, BRU or Target is not good enough. But then everyone keeps telling me that I can’t just factor in the ease and convenience of the stroller, I have to consider the comfort of the child, etc. Like I said, what a racket. And me, what a dummy.
The Little Gym and Music Together
Remember last week I said I should include something in each entry about all the things I said I would NEVER do once I had a baby? Well here is yet another one…
I had always said that the most ridiculous things I had ever seen were those dumb ass Gymboree type places that simply prey upon parents’ guilt and competitive sides. I hated the fact that these parents actually believed that “Little Johnny” needed to, at the ripe old age of 10 months, develop his muscular strength and cognitive development through the use of brightly colored gym equipment, all the while being sung to by an overly cheery, annoyingly perky (ha!) instructor. I felt this was capitalism at its best, the marketing of the promise of a smarter, BETTER child. I thought the parents were nothing more than a sorry bunch of lemmings that would be better off removing their thumbs from their asses, seeing the forest for the trees, and entering a world called “reality.” After all, our generation never had any of this stuff and last time I checked, we all turned out pretty OK.
Well just add me to the lemming list as I sit on my own thumb.
Right down the street from where we live is an outfit called “The Little Gym.” It is essentially a knock-off Gymboree, complete with gymnastics equipment, jungle gym type apparatus, balls, toys, springboards and even an “air track.” (Air track is one of those inflatable, huge jumpy things that you see at carnivals). Every time I go to the grocery store I see this place simply teeming with kids, all of whom look deliriously happy so like the lemming I am, I decide to go in one day and get a look-see for myself. I was offered the standard free trial class in which I thought Cameron would be completely indifferent. In a class of about 12 girls, Cameron was the youngest (by about 4 months) and therefore, the least advanced so again, I had my doubts as to whether he would truly benefit in such an environment. Well, I must admit that I have to give this place (and similar places) their due. These little one-year olds all knew all the songs, the games, everything. They seemed relatively confident in their abilities to do things like hang/play/jump on the uneven bars, balance beam and spring board. They were all doing somersaults and other things I didn’t think 12 – 18 month old kids could do. Of course, what do I know, right?
Anyway, Cameron loved it. He was squealing, shrieking and laughing the whole time, chasing after these little girls, jumping (with my help of course), on whatever he could. He even would hang from the uneven bars without any help for almost a minute, he’s a strong little baby. So of course, even though it was ridiculously overpriced, I signed up for a session starting in January because even though I still, in a way think these sorts of places are a bunch of malarkey, how could I deny my little baby when he obviously derived so much pleasure out of it all?
I also signed Cameron up for a music class that meets once a week. There is once again, an instructor who leads the class in singing songs, gaining rhythm, and appreciating different kinds of music. Again, this is the sort of class that a year ago, would have had me hysterical on the floor, laughing at the parents who bought into it. I would have said that that parent needs to turn on a damn radio or a music box for the kid, get a life and move along. But that was a year ago and now I know better.
You know what I find so funny? When I used to spout off about these sorts of things, I used to get SO mad when people would say to me, “You’ll understand once you have a child.” Man, I could murder when I would hear those words. But honestly, people were right, it is different when you have a child, it’s all about them, their happiness (within reason), and it is this same happiness that in my situation, negates the bullshit factor of whatever it is that I am doing. So like, yeah, I’m a lemming and I’m just falling into the same trap like all these other parents, but you know what? Who’s it hurting? Not I and certainly not my baby, who is, and I ask you to pardon the pun NOT intended, happy as a Clam. :)
The Birds Have Got to Go
On a totally unrelated topic…
I am an animal lover, I really am. I believe all living creatures should stay just that way – living. I would never intentionally kill an animal unless I or a family member was being attacked. Killing an innocent animal for sport is in my opinion cowardly, cruel and disgusting. Nevertheless, I am about ready to buy a shotgun and take out all the birds that come and crap on our fence. Our entire backyard is enclosed by a six foot high fence that separates our yard from our neighbor’s yard. Our neighbors have a birdhouse/birdfeeder very close to the fence which attracts about a million birds. Because of this eyesore, this germ factory disguised as a dwelling for the feathered, my nice, pristine, once germ-free fence is coated in crap, at least one side of it is. I am wondering, do you think there is any way I could ask my neighbors to move their birdhouse without offending them? I just feel as though their stupid house is totally infringing upon my right to a clean fence and that that is so unfair. It would be no different if I planted a crab apple tree near the fence that grew until it hung over onto the neighbor’s backyard and cluttered up their backyard with rotting crab apples. I know I learned about all this stuff in law school but do I honestly remember any of it? Of course not. I am sure that they have every legal right to have a birdhouse but perhaps the homeowner’s association has some provision prohibiting it. One can hope.
That is all for this week. I have got to get to bed, we are getting up really early so we can get a good start for our trip tomorrow.
And before I forget, congratulations to Jenny W. on the birth of Katherine Grace!
Love,
Corinne and Cam
Born 3/15/02
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