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Home › Articles › Behavior › When Lovey Is Lost

When Lovey Is Lost

Ways to Prevent It and Helping Your Child Cope

By Renee Roberson

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Glasser says that if a parent feels the child was ready to give up the lost object anyway, an idea is to suggest something like a "bye-bye blankey" ceremony where you wrap the remaining baby blankets together and give them to a younger child, such as a new cousin in the family or baby in the neighborhood.

"There's no one-size-fits-all approach to coping with a lost lovey," Glasser says. "The key is to be sensitive, flexible and understanding as your child gradually develops the skills to comfort herself. Whether you introduce a new security object or help your child adjust to life without it, the need for a lovey won't last long. Be patient and hang in there."

Glasser also warns that during this difficult time, your child may have more difficulty falling asleep during naps or at night. This is normal behavior, and she recommends that parents offer extra attention and support to help their child cope.

"In time and with your support, this phase will pass – and your child will learn the important lesson that you'll be available as a source of support and encouragement during life's inevitable challenges and transitions," Glasser says.

And finally, realize that whatever you do or however brave your child may act when losing a lovey, there will still be a fair amount of pain involved on your child's part. Be empathetic and listen whenever your child wants to talk about it and treat the loss as you would the loss of a close friend who moved away from the neighborhood.

Losing a lovey is something many children have to go through in their lifetimes, and like most painful moments, they will recover. It just may take a little time.

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