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Home › Articles › Fatherhood › What Parenting Books Don't Tell You

What Parenting Books Don't Tell You

12 More Tips for New Dads

By I.J. Schecter

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Books on parenting are available in droves these days, and they're full of valuable information, but that doesn't mean they tell you everything. Here are a dozen important tips I've discovered only through good old-fashioned, firsthand experience.

"What Do You Mean, He's Not at My Breast?"
The combination of exhaustion and constant feeding may at times cause your wife to think she's nursing when she's actually not. The experience can be unsettling, so if you come back from the bathroom in the middle of the night to hear her say, "Yes, my angel" or "Can you burp him for me?" respond by explaining slowly that the baby is not at her breast but asleep in the next room. Don't make fun of her disorientation or get frustrated by her incredulity – unless you're willing to take over breastfeeding duties, that is.

And You Thought You Washed Gym Clothes a Lot
Soon after your baby arrives, it may seem you're doing laundry every other hour. But take heart: Even an entire hamper full of a newborn's clothes takes up only about half a machine load. Also, transporting it is easier, since you can stuff half a dozen pairs of tiny socks in your pockets. (Note: When emptying the dryer, make certain you've found all the socks. They're easily missed.)

Don't Make It a Competition
Being a new parent means experiencing a level of joy you didn't know existed, but it also means dealing with significant sleep deprivation. You and your spouse will manage better if you make a pact before the baby comes not to compete about who's more exhausted. Maybe your wife thinks you have it easy going to work during the day and only having to deal with the baby in the evenings. Maybe you feel she doesn't know how tiring work is, and you just wish you could have a break. Communicate with each other about how you're feeling, and do it without resentment. Remember, you're in this together.


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