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And What Do You Do?
When Women Choose to Stay Home
By Loretta F. Kaufman and Mary W. Quigley
Margo speaks from her heart: "The support group I have of military wives isn't just necessary for me to stay positive mentally, it is actually essential to my life. Without other wives to speak to who experience what we do, I am not sure I could survive. That sounds melodramatic, I know, but ultimately it is what I believe. I have plenty of friends from college and all other walks of life who just really can't comprehend what my life is like. With the wives of military men, there is an instant bond, complete understanding for what life is about for us. Then there is always the thought that if something would ever happen to my husband, I know that group of women would be the ones holding me up all along the way. These wives are my lifeline. They hold me together when I am just too exhausted to move and feel like I just can't make it another day separated from my husband. They listen and understand my pain as they feel it too. They know how it feels to hold and child and tell him 'Daddy loves you and he'll be home soon,' even though you still have four more months to go. I can't imagine not having these amazing women to hold onto for they bring more strength, love, and courage into my life than I can even explain."
The other Navy wives helped her navigate the difficult decision during those months her husband was away, and the self-esteem that she worried about losing actually blossomed. The experience was like a do-it-yourself Outward Bound. Wives, military or otherwise, don't need a packaged outdoor experience to help build faith in one's self; just give them an old-fashioned crisis or two and chances are, they will make it through with flying colors, emerging more self-confident.
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