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Not-So-Tiny Anxiety
Overcoming the Fear of Caring
for Your Preemie
for Your Preemie
By Katherine Bontrager
After Brenda Sullivan's twin sons were born prematurely, it took three weeks of careful care in the NICU before they were ready to go home for the first time. And like most new parents of preemies, it was a day of 
excitement and apprehension for Sullivan. For months skilled professionals had cared for her boys, but now that responsibility was in her hands – a daunting task for any mom.
"What helped me the most was observing the nurses in the NICU," Sullivan says. "They were obviously not gentle, so that helped me see that the boys weren't fragile. And when I got home, it was helpful that I could call the NICU nurses 24/7 for advice, which I did several times."
And such extra help was important, especially since Sullivan was so sleep deprived that she had to keep a notebook with everything the twins did – from eating and sleeping to dirty diapers – because otherwise she had no ability to remember and answer a visiting nurse's questions.
"I worked hard to take care of both the boys and have my helpers do things for me and around the house," Sullivan says. "I didn't want to be afraid to be alone with them. This was a challenge since most people wanted to help with the babies. After I felt confident being alone with them, I loosened up on accepting help from others."
Sullivan's mom came every weekday for six weeks, which was critical help, and a visiting nurse handled the boys' checkups in the beginning. She also joined the Mother's of Twins Club, whose support was invaluable for years. And all the hard work and support paid off. Today Sullivan's twins are 14 years old and a far cry from the tiny newborns that once needed so much special attention.
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