- my iParenting
- quick clicks
- babies today articles
- babies today q&a
- toddlers today articles
- toddlers today q&a
- breastfeed.com articles
- breastfeed.com q&a
- message boards
- research baby names
- prepare a birth plan
- content channels
- ip channel rss feeds
- read birth stories
- read parenting stories
- recommended books
- e-newsletters
- safety recalls
- ip diaries
- ip store
- mom of the month
- dad of the month
- editor's letter
- letters to the editor
 |
- e-newsletters
- Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters
- award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Even Super Mom Needs a Break
Finding Time for You
By Lisa Marie Metzler
Most women already know what the statistics bear: We are still carrying most of the load. We juggle kids, work, home, volunteering and everything else in between. Are we really enriching our lives by doing everything?
"When we are stressed, overwhelmed and tired, we have a shorter fuse. We become irritable, and it's more difficult to handle the challenges of being with children," says Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, a personal life coach in Aurora, Colo.
Logically, we know that running ourselves on empty isn't good for our health or our families. But the instinct to be a devoted mother means operating in overdrive. We want our children to be happy, and we desire to give them every possible life experience, even at the expense of our own needs. We feel guilty if our children don't have everything we think they should have.
However, Victoria Moran, author of Creating a Charmed Life (Harper San Francisco, 1999) says we need to let go of the distorted images we have of the "sainted mother." "We've got to give ourselves a break, or we're passing the old guilt patterns along to our daughters," Moran says.
Heather Brockhaus, a busy mom in Bartlett, Tenn., used to struggle with the guilt factor. "If I didn't clean the house while my daughter napped, I felt like a slacker," she says. But being mother to a strong-willed toddler expends a lot of energy. Brockhaus realizes if she doesn't take advantage of her daughter's naptime to re-group, she's too stressed to be a good mother.
"When we emerge from our solitude, we are stronger, more relaxed and calmer," says Disbennett-Lee. She adds that as much as we need a break, our children need one, too. When we establish "mommy time," we are in fact helping our children learn independence, socialization and hopefully, an appreciation of what we do for them. Even more importantly, we are demonstrating that taking care of ourselves is important.
"Frazzled is not pretty," Moran says. "If you don't put gas in your car, it won't run; if you don't give some nurturing to yourself, you'll be a pretty poor nurturer."
Want to see more?
Comments
There are no comments for this article yet.Be the first to 
|
Post As:
|
||
| Enter your comment below: | ||
| Title | ||
| Comment Text | ||
| CAPTCHA | ||
| Please note that any comments submitted become the property of Disney Family / iParenting and can be edited and posted at our discrection. | ||
