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Today I Am a Mother
The Transformation From Pregnancy to Motherhood
By Stacy Howlin Clark
One day I was playing peek-a-boo with a giggling baby and today I have so many surprising insights. I understand now why kids can love a purple singing dinosaur so much, and that manufacturers know what they are talking about when they say ages 3 and up. That blocks are fun at any age. And, no matter what big, important, worrisome happenings are occurring in the world, sitting on the driveway blowing bubbles on a sunny day can make all of life seem all right.
In my new enlightened state, I understand now that even though you cannot see a yogurt-eating monster, it can still live in your bedroom and make a mess of things when you're not around. I glimpse great truths now, like life goes on even if your living room is not immaculate or if you have to hunt in the back of your closet for something, anything, which though less than fashionable, is after all, clean. I see now that I will have days when I have some sense of order in my life. Yet I may always have real and loud and pleading thoughts about how I should sell everything and pitch a tent in a field in Nebraska.
Today I can see I will never get it all right all the time. I will get shampoo in my daughter's eyes when I wash her hair. I will miss the landmark study that says toddlers cannot live on peanut butter and jelly and macaroni and cheese for days on end. Likewise I will be too lenient on bedtime, too lax on potty training, too protective at the playground.
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