25 Things Every New Mother Should Know

By Martha Sears, R.N.

Twenty-eight years ago I (Martha) became a mother for the first time. Even though I had "R.N." after my name I was pretty frightened. All those babies I'd played "Mommy" with in the hospital were other people's babies, not my own. I had to learn how to be a mother to my little Jimmy from scratch. It was intense and personal learning, and I have been privileged to experience it intensely and personally seven more times.

My husband, Bill, learned along with me all the things we discuss in this book for brand-new mothers. My voice, speaking mother-to-mother, will dominate the book, with Bill's interjected here and there to give his perspective as a father and pediatrician.

This is not a traditional baby-care book. You won't find anything in it about diaper rash, cord care, or how to give a bath. You can get that information from a lot of other sources. Instead, this book is a guide to mothering your baby, and it is as much about the process of becoming a mother as it is about babies. It will help you to get to know your baby better, and we hope that it will also help you understand yourself as you take on this new, motherly role.

We believe that babies have a lot to teach mothers. Listening to your baby and responding to his or her cues will lead you into a parenting style that will help both of you thrive. Biology and infant behavior will help you get started and build your confidence as you and your baby develop a two-way trusting relationship. But this is not an ideal world we live in, and there are forces you'll meet along the way that can make you doubt your mothering intuition. We hope that this book will prepare you for some of those bumps in the road, and will help you meet the challenges and changes ahead.