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Playgroup Perks and Pitfalls

Moms Share Their Experiences

By Shel Franco

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If you're spending your day caught between diapers and feedings, you might be longing for moments of adult conversation and time away from the humdrum of home. Wouldn't it be nice to know a place where crying babies make beautiful music and spit-up stained blouses are en vogue?

Playgroups are popping up in neighborhoods all over America. They can be as formal as weekly dates with Gymboree or as nonchalant as get-togethers with the girls – and the kids. While it might seem like "everybody's doing it," playgroups aren't for everyone. Here, two moms describe the ups and downs of toddler playgroups to help you decide what's right for you.

The Ups
When Amy O'Malley's son was 1 year old, a neighbor invited her to a weekly playgroup. O'Malley, the mother of one from Oak Park, Ill., welcomed the opportunity to get out of the house. After one year, she's realized that the weekly meetings are about more than adult camaraderie; her toddler has gained some things, too.

"I think it's helped his language skills," she says. "After almost every playgroup, I notice new words."

And even though early toddlers cannot grasp the concept of sharing, O'Malley believes it is important for her son to witness older kids taking turns. The older kids also have provided her with the opportunity to learn how her son may behave in the coming months. "You see other kids going through it and you think, 'Good. It's OK that he's doing this,'" she explains.

O'Malley acknowledges that there is a dark side to playgroup: Scuffles happen and kids are bound to show up sick. Still, she maintains a healthy attitude about what goes on. "[My son] needs to learn to say 'No! Don't do that to me,'" she says. "Even bad experiences are things kids need to learn."


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