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Baby Step

By Debbie Friedman

The "Walking of the Child" is a traditional night of dancing, feasting and singing in Samoa to celebrate a baby going from a totally dependent state to joining the playing children. There are also celebrations for the "sitting of the child" and the "crawling of the child," but I think walking is the big one because the party goes on all night.

Many cultures, especially those closely connected to the land, hold their children close the first year and the first steps are a time of change for the mother and child relationship. Sometimes this change is ritualized, other times it is a gradual process of the child joining a broader part of the community. I loved carrying my son Ryan close to me. I found a Snugli-type front pack that worked really well much of the time, but as Ryan neared the age of one, he seemed to have ideas of his own and was reluctant to stay in very long.

I tend to have a good amount of cynicism for charts, measurements and what I perceive as often unrealistic expectations about "normal" developmental milestones in our culture. As for my son's first steps, I figured they would happen at their own time and pace -- a process so natural I would barely notice. Then one cold winter day as Ryan's first birthday neared, we were making some home movies with a borrowed video camera. Alex, my husband, was filming Ryan crawling around tormenting the cat, footage of the