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Postpartum Depression
Preventing Tragedy
By Marcia Starkman
I remember sitting in my prenatal class almost 17 years ago. The atmosphere in the room was filled with joyful anticipation, but a palpable feeling of anxiety as well. We only wanted to hear the positive things about the childbirth experience, not the "what ifs" about things that go wrong.
We were all due for September babies, and had been a very close class. Before it ended, we picked a date near Christmas and decided to have a reunion to see each other again, and of course, to introduce our offspring.
About a week before the reunion, there was one couple no one had heard from. We had been unable to reach them by phone. The answer to their absence came the next day, on the front page of the newspaper. Louise, the mother we were waiting for, had walked in front of a speeding train and killed herself. When someone from the class was finally able to speak with her husband, he relayed how unhappy she had been and how unusual her behavior had been since she'd had the baby. He said her doctor thought she probably had postpartum depression. At the time, we sadly went ahead with the reunion. At that time, no one knew or really understood what postpartum depression was. All we felt was, "How could a loving mother kill herself at this happy time in her life?" I tried to imagine this family's future Christmases, so close to the anniversary of the mother's suicide, with the child still alive. I hoped this would be the last time I heard about such a tragedy. It was too painful to think about.
Seventeen years later, it happened again. This one was even more heart-wrenching to me, as a mom, a psychotherapist, and someone who has also experienced depression. Another young mother -- a physician and psychotherapist -- holding her 6-month-old son in her arms, jumped in front of a moving subway. He died immediately; she died nine days later. The questions and conjecture and "Monday morning quarterback" interpretations were all over Toronto's media. Same question again. How could a loving mother kill herself at this happy time in her life?
