Your Child's First Birthday Party

Learning to Identify and Nurture Little Feelings

By Julia Rosien

For many parents, a child's first birthday heralds the end of babyhood and the beginning of toddlerhood. A walking, talking little person ready to explore the world takes the place of midnight feedings and T-shirts caked in spit-up. It's momentous.

Your baby probably won't remember anything about the event, but why not celebrate the first birthday with a party the whole family will treasure? It's a great way to mark how far you've come in only a year.

Limit the number of youngsters when planning your child's first party. "If a child is one, there shouldn't be any more than one other child his age," says Phyllis Cambria of Party Plans Plus in south Florida, and co-author of "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Throwing a Great Party." Limit the number of children to the age of the child. Too many children may overwhelm your birthday star and take away from his "specialness."

Relatives and special adults in your child's life will want to join in the celebration, but too much attention may make her cranky and you tense. "Give her a day that's special and focus on just her," Cambria says. "Instead of sending invitations to all your relatives, mail a booklet of photos a week after the party." If relatives do come, keep it simple and order food in advance.

"With our first child we had a huge party and invited both sides of the family," says Steve Miller of Ontario. "By the fourth baby we held many little parties scattered over a couple of weeks. It didn't overwhelm the birthday child as much and was a great way to build self-esteem." Miller's children enjoyed smaller parties with fewer packages to open.

If you have older children, enlist their help to make the perfect party for the guest of honor. "Make decorations and get everyone involved," Cambria says. "Go on treasure hunts to garage sales, thrift shops and flea markets to find neat things to be used at the party." This "event before the event" ensures that no one feels left out. When the real party begins, siblings can be proud of the way their contributions.

Want to see more?

• Scrapbooking: Creatively Keeping Track of Your Baby's First Year
• The Urge to Compare (And Why it Gets You Nowhere)
• Toddlers Today: Celebrating Ages 1 and 2
• Toddlers Today MomsTalk